No More Advice.

Apparently I've been "Slacking" when it comes to blogging = D lol...


Personally I would like to believe I have been slacking and your anxiously waiting to hear what is brewing in this imaginative brain of mine...but is this really true or was I just doing the right thing by taking a break from writing about all this "love" and "boy" or "man" nonsense? & what is the difference between a "man" and a "boy"... I am starting to wonder if there is a difference, maybe I've just met "boys" then that would mean that 95% of my friends have also only met or had relationships with "boys". Do nice guys really finish last? Why in the world would us "independent" females allow that???

SOOOOO SILLY!

Topics: How does one avoid "jealousy" as a secure, confident, independent female? And is it even possible for females to not be jealous or do they hide it extremely well?
.... I've always said that I don't care what you do as long as you don't sleep around on me. I've also kept my personal privacy (or tried too) and allowed my "significant other" to do the same. What do I mean? That I don't like knowing what my "boyfriend" or "man" is doing while he is not with me. I don't go through their phone or any other type of communication method. Does this mean I am not a jealous person? As much as I'd like to say that I am not and believe that, I know that I am to a certain extend. I guess my motto is "curiosity killed the cat" and I don't want to be the cat so I turn the blind eye towards any uncomfortable situation.

I've noticed that the reason why I "don't get jealous" as I like to believe, is because I ignore certain things easily and/or because I am able to make myself believe that I am better than whatever girl might be taking my "boyfriends" attention. I've also noticed myself testing the man I am trying to have a relationship with. What does this mean? that I test their boundaries and try and see how far the dude will really go if a girl was throwing their self at him. I like to believe that most men/boy whatever you'd like to call them are easy to read (look at their past, not always a good evaluation tool, but also look at who they hangout with and how those people are; look at the relationship they have with their mothers and most importantly is to look at the relationship their Momma has with their father. Behaviors are learned at a young age, men aren't born the way they are, they are MADE!

So how is it that I truly believe that I am not a jealous person? Because I believe to become blind to certain situations and I decide what I want to chose as IMPORTANT or ESSENTIAL. If a guy sleeps around on me- I see it as his loss and I was too good for him anyway. ITS ALL ABOUT PERSPECTIVE LADIES! Also remember that "text messages" can be easily misinterpreted because I know that I have a few male best friends that I can't see as anything more then a brother yet I know that some texts could be seen as excessive or offensive yet completely sincere. For example when I ask a male friend for advice about a dating situation that could be misinterpreted as me trying to flirt; really depends on word choice. ALL I AM SAYING IS THAT text messages can be misinterpreted and as hurt females we think the worse and prepare for the worse! Hence why I never care to know about their leisure time as I know where they are at, at the most critical times of the day (night time-or aka any sex time) LOL.

Am I dumb for this? Maybe but I chose what I let get to me and what doesn't. I like to feel in control and choose my battles! & I know that if I get jealous or angry I am not in control and I lose! So girls be WINNERS! PERSPECTIVE always look at the situation from different perspectives!!!

...those are just my two cents on jealousy... because you asked for this blog = )

next one...

How can you go from "lovers" to just friends without hurting???

coming soon to stores near you...LOL

yours truly,

zandy bean